Workplace Success Series for International Students (Part 1) - Relationship Building
Photo by LinkedIn Sales Solutions on Unsplash
When I was doing my internship, transitioning from a student to a full time professional, I thought as long as I worked hard and did my job well, my supervisor would just love me. Little did I know it wasn’t enough.
It wasn’t until a couple of years later, when I started a new job and my American supervisor gave me advice that I still haven’t forgotten to this day: Build relationships with colleagues first.
I took her advice but wasn’t sure why this was so important until a few years into my career and when I became a supervisor myself.
“Without a good relationship with your colleagues, even if you’re skilled at what you do, you might not be able to accomplish much because your colleagues don’t necessarily need to go out of their way to work with you - your priority might not be theirs. ”
Many professionals from Asia have very strong subject matter expertise; however, their technical skills can only take them to a mid-level place at best in the workplace. To advance their career further in America, there are several important skills to develop.
Based on my personal experience and work with international students/professionals over the years, I put together this 5-part series for you. So you can learn from the successes and mistakes that I, and many international students/professionals before have made, and save some time in the trial-and-error process.
These 5 skills are: Relationship Building, Negotiation, Proactivity, Visibility, and Networking Skills.
These skills can be quite counterintuitive for many international students/professionals who grew up in a culture that focuses on grades and academic achievements, while socializing with others, participating in extracurricular activities, or anything not directly leading to getting the best grade possible, can be seen as a “waste of time.”
We’ll be going over relationship building in this blog.
Work on your relationship building skills.
They will help you quickly feel comfortable in new environments, understand the workplace culture and interpersonal dynamics, make allies, and make yourself stand out in a positive way.
How to build relationships with colleagues when you’re new to a job?
Here are 3 easy ways to go about it.
1. Stop By and Say Hi
Make sure you set aside time to stop by your colleagues’ desks and introduce yourself on your first few days of work or when coming across colleagues who are new to you.
Be prepared to share some things about yourself, such as what you’ll be doing, your relevant past experience, whom you will be working with, etc. Show your interest in getting to know them by asking about them as well. Allow the conversation to flow naturally and observe appropriate professional boundaries at the same time.
2. Schedule Lunch with Colleagues
Take the initiative and ask your colleagues to go out for lunch. Or take the opportunity when you’re invited for lunch with them.
Lunch time is a great time to get to know your coworkers on a personal level. You might find that most people try to discuss more light-hearted stuff while on their break. Don’t forget to get to know the people they interact with as well. It’s always easier once you’ve had the ice broken by another colleague!
Eventually, it might be wise to expand to colleagues outside of your team/department. This helps you keep your eyes and ears open about things that are happening on a larger scale in the organization.
3. Go to Happy Hour & Work Events
Most workplaces host events or get-togethers outside work hours as part of team-building activities.
Do your best to attend these events whenever possible.
If you’re like me who don’t or can’t drink alcohol, to try to fit in, my tip is to order a mocktail, non-alcoholic beer, or club soda.
Start up conversations with your coworkers and learn more about what they’re like outside of work. Observe the dynamics in the group, and don’t be afraid to show a bit of your personal side as well when appropriate.
Relationship building can be a daunting task for some of you. Take it step-by-step, it will feel much more manageable over time.
Remember, this isn’t just about building relationships to make sure things go well in your internship or your first job after school.
You might be surprised some of the relationships you build at a job early on might be helpful later in your career.
Questions for you:
Have you ever struggled to develop meaningful relationships with your peers/coworkers? If so, what may have contributed to it?
What are some steps you can take to build relationships in your internship or workplace?
About The Author
Many years ago I came to the U.S. from Taiwan and studied in a field that rarely accepted “fresh off the boat” international students from non-English speaking countries. I’m Dr. Vivi Hua, Psy.D. and I help international students navigate the cross-cultural aspects of their experience in the U.S., so they can succeed academically and socially and build a life and career that they desire!